Toby the (spoiler)

[kjn]

While doing my Hugo reading I came upon the scene in Seanan McGuire's An Artificial Night where Toby is suffering from an arboreal mishap. It inspired the following, to the tune of Monty Python's Eric the Half a Bee.


A one, two
A one, two, three, four

Half a tree, philosophically
Must, ipso facto, half not be
But half the tree has got to be
A vis-a-vis its entity, d'you see?

But can a tree be said to be
Or not to be an entire tree
When half the tree is not a tree
Due to some recent injury?

Singing

A laa dee dee, a one two three
Toby, the half a tree
A, B, C, D, E, F, G
Toby, the half a tree

Is this wretched demi-tree
Half asleep upon my knee
An arboretum escapee?
No! It's Toby, the half a tree

A fiddle de dumb, a fiddle de dee
Toby, the half a tree
Hoh hoh hoh, tee hee hee
Toby, the half a tree

Was she oak or ash, larch or yew
Bisected horizontally
One autumn afternoon, by me
Daughter of Amandine

Daughter of Amandine
Almost Amandine
The end

Arden Windermere?
No, almost Amandine
Oh, Arden Windermere

Comments

[occams_pyramid]

So is that Toby or not Toby?

[kjn]

*groan* Now I consider rewriting the song to include that pun.